Today we’re going to break a bit with tradition and do something a little different. Normally when we review movies for the site, they are tied to a particular Cavalcade Event. These last few weeks have been catch-up as we steamroll through the past events we’ve held. However this movie requires special notice be paid.

Originally slated to be part of the October 2008 Halloween Cavalcade, the company we purchased the DVD from was unable to get it to us in time for a showing. Originally, we were fairly disappointed. Just look at the cast for the picture: Ginger Lynn Allen, Chasey Lain, Taylor Hayes, and Jenna Jameson. Ok, there are some of you who might not immediately know who those people are, and even those that do might pretend otherwise to save face, so allow me to clear things up: They are some of the biggest names of late-80’s to 90’s porn (Don’t worry, the links are work safe). Throw in 21 Jumpstreet’s Richard Grieco, and we have a recipe for awesome. Sadly however, this recipe doesn’t take into account one thing: Christian Viel. Writer, Director, sick motherf*@%er.

I’ve seen films with nudity and enjoyed them. I’ve seen movies with disembowelments and still had fun. I’ve seen cinema with violence/gore/mayhem and laughed, cheered, and overall had a good time with friends and loved ones. You know what? This ain’t any of those times. As a matter of fact, this movie is one of the single most morally reprehensible pieces of trash that I have ever forced myself to sit through.

The movie takes place in back woods of Ireland and while there are hints of witchery and mentions of Samhain but don’t let that fool you, it’s really a stupid rip off of The Hills Have Eyes and the mutant cannibal story.

Let’s get down to brass tacks, shall we?

We have:

• A woman ripped in half, intestines spilling out all over the place.
• An armless/legless man on a spinning on a spit, penis still attached and swaying in the breeze.
• An hour of padding for time.
• Not one, but three impalements.
• A man strangled by his own intestine, ripped out through his bunghole.
• A woman stabbed in the chest, and her breast implant removed by the cannibals and squished around for the camera.
• A woman raped by multiple cannibals, giving exposition while a bloody dead fetus lies in the middle of the floor with the umbilical cord still attached.

Not only is the movie disgusting, it doesn’t make any damn sense. The ending is ripped out of another movie entirely and doesn’t seem to have any real purpose other than to, you know what? I didn’t care, I was just happy that the damn thing was over. It’s editing is bad enough and the end product is such that the sick M-F that wrote and directed the movie actually posted a written apology on IMDB. Of course, he’s apologizing for most of the nudity and gore being removed from the flick.

Don’t screen this for anyone. Don’t buy this from anyone. Treat this movie like the leprosy that it is. There are much better choices for campy crap horror movies with retired porn stars. A personal favorite: Evil Toons

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