Nightmare on Elm St., A

The trick to reinvigorating an older franchise is taking the old concept and adding boatloads of new stuff. Batman Begins (2005) and Star Trek (2009) ideas, and approaches. There's no sense in making the same films over again since video allows them to be watched by new generations. (Yes, being an avid fan of horror sequels, I am completely aware of the irony of that). To be successful, one has to reboot rather than remake. Thus, while Sam Bayer's 2010 remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street tries to add some new ideas, it relies too much on the original film and does not improve upon it.

Nancy Holbrook's (Rooney Mara) been having terrible....wait, no. Dean Russell's (Kellan Lutz) been having terrible nightmares about a burned man in a red and green sweater named Freddy (Jackie Earle Haley); well, at least until Freddy kills him in the pre-title sequence. Then, Kris Fowles (Katie Cassidy) is having nightmares for the next half hour until, know. Finally, halfway through the film, our real protagonist is revealed to be Nancy after all.

Nancy and would-be love interest Quentin Smith (Kyle Gallner) soon discover the history they share with Freddy Krueger's other victims: they attended the preschool where Freddy was custodian, and accused of gettin' touchy with the kids; prompting their parents to do the only sensible thing: hunt him down and burn him alive. Feeling somewhat wronged, Freddy's brutally murdering all of these children in their dreams unless Nancy and Quentin can determine what really happened at the preschool.

As a horror movie this isn't a bad picture. Sure, the characters are fairly generic; if you've seen the earlier recent horror remakes of Friday the 13th (2009) or One Missed Call (2008) , then you are familiar with all the stereotypes. Of course, this makes it difficult for the audience when the narrative wanders aimlessly for the first 45 minutes. Granted, horror movies aren't known for their character depth, but this series has always made the effort to make their cannon fodder just a wee bit more identifiable... before they're summarily eviscerated. or

An interesting addition is the conceit of insomnia causing spontaneous “mirco-naps,” Freddy is no longer bound to normal sleep patterns, he can now seemingly appear anytime, anywhere-provided the teenager has been up for 3 days straight. Staying up any longer can lead to irreversible comas., tying into the larger mystery plot, which doesn't really work as the audience already knows that the killer is Freddy Krueger.

While stylish, the remake doesn't hold a candle to the original, which was genuinely creepy and before it got fucking scaryWes Craven created tension and mood before delivering the horrific violence. This film adheres to the “new school” of horror: quiet, quiet, quiet, LOUD NOISE! It doesn't really work after the audience recognizes the pattern. Bayer attempts to recreate certain death scenes, but fails to even match the Tina (Amanda Wyss) death from the original, let alone improve upon it.

But the unforgivable sin here is the handling of Nancy.

Nancy Thompson (Heather Langenkamp) was possibly the greatest final girl ever. After being stalked and victimized, she hunts Freddy (Robert Englund) down and takes the fight to him. Conversely, Rooney Mara's Nancy looks like a stiff wind would knock her over, and she has to rely on Quentin throughout. Nancy's trademark inner-strength is nowhere to be found, which is a shame since these teens need all the help they can get against Jackie Earle Haley's malevolent and spiteful Freddy. Haley, by the bye, knocks it out of the park, mixing in the traditional gallows humor, though played down. Haley brings an anger not seen in the previous films, which is an interesting perspective.

Here's is the one legitimate complaint about Haley's turn as Freddy: he's really short.

Overall, the film is not as disappointing as I thought it would be. While not as memorably disturbing as Wes Craven's original, it does set the stage for future, to which I look forward. The series just needs to move into more original territory and create new nightmares.


Liam Neeson will come to your country and kill EVERYONE.

Well, okay, he need's a little provocation first.

Neeson plays ex-CIA Super-Ninja Brian Mills. Mills retired to be closer to his teenage daughter, Kim (the 26-year-old Maggie Grace) who lives in Los Angeles with her mother Lenore (Famke Janssen), who married some rich scumbag named Stuart (Xander Berkley, who's made a whole career out of playing these sorts) who can get Mills' daughter a pony, but is fairly useless when it comes to anything outside of being a rich guy.

Lenore is the classic movie ex-wife stereotype: bitchy, unforgiving, uninformed and hypocritical. All the trouble begins when she bullies Mills into signing some sort of release to let their, go on a trip to Paris. He signs off on this whole Paris trip only to find out, too late, that his daughter is actually going to follow U2 on tour.

U2 is an Irish band, and-well-Jesus, what good have the Irish done? I mean, aside from giving us good beer, music, culture, and Liam Neeson?

Mills waves goodbye at the airport, then worries and worries about her. He keeps calling her cell, only to find every parent's worst nightmare realized: hearing her on the phone as she's about to carted off by smarmy foreign slave traders.

Without Neeson, this movie would be total crap. But when he decides it's time to turn it up to 11 , by GOD-does he ever. Mills is a one-man wrecking crew, tearing Paris apart brick-by-brick. He will shoot, beat, chase, or (only as a last resort) even pay anyone to get his daughter back.

At it's core, this is a combination flag-waving "go America!" propaganda film, with a little parental revenge fantasy thrown in for spice. If you look closely, you realize that Mills was an absentee father, and is making up for in spades by killing at least four different members of varying ethnic groups to get his kid back. Unfortunately, there's a dour quality to the whole affair, and while Neeson can sell anything-here he's selling a stone cold killer who will kill people all kinds of dead in all kinds of ways. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

One last note: why is it a Hollywood convention to have very corpulent men always require two or three girls to sleep with? I mean, it's not like these guys are word-class lovers. Or else they'd be thinner, right?

Pair this off with another movie in need of a good ribbing, like the dreadfully self-serious Fast & Furious , and you could have fun mocking all the furrowed eyebrows and growled line delivery. Otherwise, you can go all revenge happy with any of the Death Wish series.